Bondservant

I am in my brother's room. Piled on my left are books for checking. On his bed are formal theme notebooks which I just finished checking. Writing, really, is one of the waterloos of my students. Only 5 out of my 25 students got a passing score.

With all these checking work, I am beginning to dislike my job. I don't mind all this checking- but with the deadlines, I panic a bit. I know, I know, that "fear not" has been mentioned in the bible many times. Right now, I want to draft my resignation letter, or at least verbally express my intent to leave.

I really, really do.

As I listen to Blackaby's audio devotions,I hear him talk about not having the right to make our own plans for our own life because we gave up that right the moment we became christians. WE as Paul describes, are bondservants of Jesus Christ.WE as servants never tell our Master what to do, rather, we as servants just wait for instructions from the Master. He further expands that in the old testament, He is our potter and we are the clay.

I want to cry.

Lord am I a student now? Am I the teacher, a student now in Your school. Am I being disobedient, unyielding to Your will for me? Help me in the littleness of my faith with the limitations of my mind. I am inclined to panic and cringe in fear. I feel powerless but I know that I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength. Its not about what I see around me but its all about Your promises.

I remember You told me before, if I will still work abroad.... I remember it so well.
Please help me. You who brought me here will be faithful to uphold me. Preserve me Oh God for I put my trust in You. Whoever goes to the Lord for safety, whoever remains under the protection of the Almighty can say to Him, You are my Defender and Protector, You are my God in Whom will I trust. He will keep you safe from all hidden dangers and from all deadly diseases. He will cover you with His wings, you will be safe in His care.

... because He has loved me, I will set him on high.

I have nothing to hold on to except Your promises.

In Jesus' Name,
amen!