Glory be to God in the highest. Peace on earth and goodwill to men.

Dear Blog,

Its been a while. You always get bumped off due to my hectic schedule as an elementary school teacher here in a school in Araneta, Quezon City. I wonder why God has led me here. I know He has a purpose. Foremost,teaching here was an answered prayer. Right after school, I wanted to be employed in a Chinese christian school with a small class size. My principal asked me to demo-teach in a class of 15 grade five students and so I became excited. Right now, I have 25 students in all and it is my first time to teach in such a setting. Im beginning to get the hang of what we do here, and the school year is almost over.

I hear Sadie crying. I wonder why.. I better go down to check on her. I miss blogging, capturing my musings in this square online sheet to be read by no one else but me.

Meanwhile, I better get going. I am going downstairs to check on mum and pop, also the kiddie-does, they are crying, must be sleepy.

Your grace is sufficient for me, Your strength is made perfect in my weakness, Oh Lord.

Bondservant

I am in my brother's room. Piled on my left are books for checking. On his bed are formal theme notebooks which I just finished checking. Writing, really, is one of the waterloos of my students. Only 5 out of my 25 students got a passing score.

With all these checking work, I am beginning to dislike my job. I don't mind all this checking- but with the deadlines, I panic a bit. I know, I know, that "fear not" has been mentioned in the bible many times. Right now, I want to draft my resignation letter, or at least verbally express my intent to leave.

I really, really do.

As I listen to Blackaby's audio devotions,I hear him talk about not having the right to make our own plans for our own life because we gave up that right the moment we became christians. WE as Paul describes, are bondservants of Jesus Christ.WE as servants never tell our Master what to do, rather, we as servants just wait for instructions from the Master. He further expands that in the old testament, He is our potter and we are the clay.

I want to cry.

Lord am I a student now? Am I the teacher, a student now in Your school. Am I being disobedient, unyielding to Your will for me? Help me in the littleness of my faith with the limitations of my mind. I am inclined to panic and cringe in fear. I feel powerless but I know that I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength. Its not about what I see around me but its all about Your promises.

I remember You told me before, if I will still work abroad.... I remember it so well.
Please help me. You who brought me here will be faithful to uphold me. Preserve me Oh God for I put my trust in You. Whoever goes to the Lord for safety, whoever remains under the protection of the Almighty can say to Him, You are my Defender and Protector, You are my God in Whom will I trust. He will keep you safe from all hidden dangers and from all deadly diseases. He will cover you with His wings, you will be safe in His care.

... because He has loved me, I will set him on high.

I have nothing to hold on to except Your promises.

In Jesus' Name,
amen!

Why Fall in Love?

I avoid falling for anyone, nor letting anyone fall for me. It is pointless at this time to entertain such thoughts. I have goals and these emotions just might get in the way of their completion. I wonder too, if I am again living under the law, I wonder if this behavior stems from operating under the law, not under grace.

Its a lazy Saturday morning. I will be heading for school in a while to get textbooks, workbooks and formal theme notebooks which I will be checking. I love to teach, its the checking and the making of grades which I need to master. I will be attending the bible study later, the topic is on the faithfulness of God and the details that He requires for christians to follow.

My brother is still snoring. He is driving me to school. And we agreed on leaving early. I wont wake him up-

For some reason, I woke up early, but not that early because I was unable to attend the dawnwatch service. I was up at 11:30. I chanced upon "Little Women" at TCM. I watched a bit, and decided to go to bed.

I hear my nephew's voice. I better go down.
Later, blog.

Psalm 23

I remember how Psalm 23 became very real to me while I was doing my thesis, how the words sprang to life, how He was my cheer and company during those difficult times. I had nothing then but I was in all sufficiency with His word. I could not see anything at the end of the road. My eyes were often blurry with tears. My heart wrenched and I was groping in the dark but not too long and not feeling totally helpless for it was then that I learned that truth- Whom have I in heaven but Thee, there is nothing on earth I desire besides Thee. I experienced Him in ways I never did before. Now I go back to it because I need to. I'll be typing the chapter, line by line. With my bible beside me, I read, pause, and reflect on His role in my life as my Shepherd. I am forever grateful for the promises in His word and the comfort of His presence. And I know that nothing else would suffice. Nothing would ever, ever replace the fullness of joy with Jesus.

The LORD Is My Shepherd
A Psalm of David.

1The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. Here, I am reminded that nothing beats having the Lord Himself as our shepherd. Mind you, Lord is followed by is. He is our shepherd. Not was, will be, but is. He is right before us, right beside us, right in us, steering our wheel, blocking our way if the need be so to prevent us from danger. I'm really a little child walking around in this maze called life and I stretch out my tiny hand to be enveloped in his palms. The word my comes after is and that brings me to a very personal relationship with Him. He is my shepherd. He is the shepherd of great Christians in the past-George Mueller, Adonirah Judson, Hudson Taylor, great men of God, known preachers who set pulpits aflame- and He is mine too. As He was in their lives, so is He is in mine and as He met them in the deepest recesses of their hearts so He meets me.

I shall not want. I have no lack for anything. Foremost, what else could I ever need if I have Him? Whom have I in heaven but Thee, there is nothing on earth I desire besides Thee..I am immediately reminded of the hymn Thine own great presence to cheer and to guide.. Your presence is indeed great Lord. Your presence is indeed great..

Its 6:09 in the morning now I got up from bed really early, and instead of heading for church to attend the dawnwatch, I chose to meditate on the 23rd of Psalm as I write.The birds are chirping their morning call. I hear the sound of sweeping outside. Must be our neighbor-broomstick in hand, gathering all brown, crunchy, snappy, curled leaves into a heap.

Will treat ma to breakfast outside.

Thank You Lord for this morning, This is the day that the Lord has made! I will rejoice and be glad in it my Shepherd.

Sorry

. . . fellow laborer in the gospel of Christ . . . —1 Thessalonians 3:2


After sanctification, it is difficult to state what your purpose in life is, because God has moved you into His purpose through the Holy Spirit. He is using you now for His purposes throughout the world as He used His Son for the purpose of our salvation. If you seek great things for yourself, thinking, “God has called me for this and for that,” you barricade God from using you. As long as you maintain your own personal interests and ambitions, you cannot be completely aligned or identified with God’s interests. This can only be accomplished by giving up all of your personal plans once and for all, and by allowing God to take you directly into His purpose for the world. Your understanding of your ways must also be surrendered, because they are now the ways of the Lord.

I must learn that the purpose of my life belongs to God, not me. God is using me from His great personal perspective, and all He asks of me is that I trust Him. I should never say, “Lord, this causes me such heartache.” To talk that way makes me a stumbling block. When I stop telling God what I want, He can freely work His will in me without any hindrance. He can crush me, exalt me, or do anything else He chooses. He simply asks me to have absolute faith in Him and His goodness. Self-pity is of the devil, and if I wallow in it I cannot be used by God for His purpose in the world. Doing this creates for me my own cozy “world within the world,” and God will not be allowed to move me from it because of my fear of being “frost-bitten.”

Sorry Jesus for wallowing in self pity. I forgot I prayed that I am at Your disposal. I am blessed in so many ways...Help me to focus on You and on You alone, not even on my own circumstances.

I love You. I guess Psalm 73:25 is the best prayer for what I feel right now. Thank You Jesus, I love You so much.

The Overshadowing of God's Personal Deliverance...

The Overshadowing of God’s Personal Deliverance
I am with you to deliver you,’ says the Lord —Jeremiah 1:8


God promised Jeremiah that He would deliver him personally— “. . . your life shall be as a prize to you . . .” (Jeremiah 39:18 ). That is all God promises His children. Wherever God sends us, He will guard our lives. Our personal property and possessions are to be a matter of indifference to us, and our hold on these things should be very loose. If this is not the case, we will have panic, heartache, and distress. Having the proper outlook is evidence of the deeply rooted belief in the overshadowing of God’s personal deliverance.

The Sermon on the Mount indicates that when we are on a mission for Jesus Christ, there is no time to stand up for ourselves. Jesus says, in effect, “Don’t worry about whether or not you are being treated justly.” Looking for justice is actually a sign that we have been diverted from our devotion to Him. Never look for justice in this world, but never cease to give it. If we look for justice, we will only begin to complain and to indulge ourselves in the discontent of self-pity, as if to say, “Why should I be treated like this?” If we are devoted to Jesus Christ, we have nothing to do with what we encounter, whether it is just or unjust. In essence, Jesus says, “Continue steadily on with what I have told you to do, and I will guard your life. If you try to guard it yourself, you remove yourself from My deliverance.” Even the most devout among us become atheistic in this regard— we do not believe Him. We put our common sense on the throne and then attach God’s name to it. We do lean to our own understanding, instead of trusting God with all our hearts (see Proverbs 3:5-6 ).

Been a While

Its 12:04 and in a few hours, I want to be up and about, on my knees, asking God for His favor as I go to work. It would be day two. I was not surprised hearing straight from the school principal's mouth that he was in full time ministry before. I had the impression he was day one. I was correct.

I really enjoyed his teaching today. Rhema hit home hard.
Sigh..I really miss the speakers in the computer.
I want to listen to some songs nowadays. Just like this one below-
Let me just save it in my blog so I can play it in the guitar tomorrow.

Lord Reign In Me
Written by Brenton Brown
AbABbBCC#DEbEFF#G

VERSE 1:
C G F G
Over all the earth, You reign on high
C G F G
Every mountain stream, every sunset sky
Am7 G F G Dm7
But my one request, Lord, my only aim
F G F/G C
Is that You'd reign in me again


CHORUS:
G F G C
Lord, reign in me, reign in Your power
G F G Am
Over all my dreams, in my darkest hour
G F G Dm7
You are the Lord of all I am
F G C G F G Am7 G F
So won't You reign in me again


VERSE 2:
C G F G
Over every thought, over every word
C G F G
May my life reflect the beauty of my Lord
Am7 G F G Dm7
'Cause You mean more to me than any earthly thing
F G F/G C
So won't You reign in me again


Goodnight,